Dallas Dating Blog | What If He’s Already Taken?

By Dallas & Fort Worth Singles Matchmaking
Home / Dating Advice / Dallas Dating Blog | What If He’s Already Taken?

Imagine meeting the man of your dreams, the one who has all the qualities you’re looking for in a serious partner. He has style, he’s funny, and he’s into the same things as you are. And to top things off, there’s a slight chance he’s into you too. The two of you get to talking and you find yourself falling head over heels for him. But then, here it comes… he tells you he has a girlfriend! Here at Dallas & Fort Worth Singles Dating Service, our matchmakers know this is a horrid feeling. So now what? Let our Dallas dating experts help you out with this awkward dating situation today.

You laugh at yourself for not noticing it, but you also feel the butterflies in your stomach. What should you do? If you find yourself falling for a man who is already taken, chances are you’ll find it hard to stay away from him. You’ll tell yourself you just want to be friends, all the while secretly wishing his girlfriend would leave him. Not only is this unhealthy, but you could potentially end up hurting his girlfriend.

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How to Handle This Very Awkward Situation

If you are looking to go the safe route, then our Dallas dating experts encourage you to follow these helpful dating tips to get you where you need to be.

1. Don’t Be Too Hard on Yourself

It is acceptable to like a man who is already taken, and just because you like him doesn’t mean you’re a home wrecker. You can admire his good qualities, even if he already has a girlfriend. However, what you must keep in mind is that it must be done from a distance. She has already won him, and he cannot be yours, unless of course, he becomes single in the near future.

Just keep in mind that admiring from afar is completely different than plotting to steal him. You need to remember that if you try to make him fall for you, you are destroying a relationship, which is not the right thing to do.

2. Find Out If He’s Really with Someone

If you don’t know him too well and aren’t sure his relationship status, then social media can be a great tool to help you figure out if he’s already taken. The two of you might be friends on Facebook, which could be what led you to fall for him in the first place. If you see photos of him with a girl, try to do a little more research.

For all you know, those photos might be a few months old or he could have just broken up with her—you just never know.

It might appear that you’re a bit too eager to find out if he’s already taken, but that’s still better than wondering about the what ifs.

3. Try to Keep His Girlfriend in Mind

If he is in fact taken, then whenever you feel the urge to flirt with him, remember that he’s, well, already taken and off the market for you. As professional matchmakers, we encourage you to put yourself in her shoes. We know you wouldn’t want another woman blatantly flirting with the man you’re dating.

Thinking of her will keep you in check. You wouldn’t want someone else doing that to you, so remember that the next time you run into him and try to contain yourself.

4. Create Some Distance

This might be hard to do, especially because you are already falling for him. You might really enjoy his company, but trust us, staying away is the best thing you can do. If not, you might have the urge to do something crazy, like flirt with him or even move in for a kiss.

If you run with the same group of friends, our Dallas dating experts encourage you to avoid going out with them for a little while. The same goes if you work in the office: try to limit your interactions with him and keep things professional. If you can, unfollow him on social media so you don’t always see his photos and whereabouts.

5. Cancel All Contact

We have already advised you to keep your distance, but eliminating all contact is the next step to do. This means disappearing from his radar (Yes, altogether). This can be easy to do if you don’t see each other on the regular basis, but this also means deleting him from any social media accounts you’re connected with.

If you do see him on a regular basis, try to do whatever you can to avoid him. You must stop talking to him, taking a different route to your office, change the hour of your lunch break, and avoid hanging out with the same group of people.

6. Focus on Something Else

We also encourage you to reroute your passion for him into something else. This can be anything from running, work, friends, or a new hobby. Try to get him off your mind by being involved in something else until you meet someone new, someone who is available for dating.

7. Think about the Things You Don’t Like

Yes, this might sound a little harsh, but try to pick out a few of his flaws that you don’t like. He might be the type who is always running late, maybe he’s a little arrogant, or maybe it’s something as little as the fact that you noticed he often has dirt underneath his fingernails (yuck). Focus on those things, or whatever it is you don’t like about him because it will help to get him off your mind.

8. If They Break Up, Think Carefully about Your Next Move

As professional matchmakers in the Dallas dating industry, we encourage you to give this man some time to recover after the breakup. You never know if this breakup can be fixed in a few days or weeks and they reconcile, leaving you hurt in the process. During this time after the breakup, we know he’s bound to be vulnerable, and we know you don’t want to be the woman who snatches a man while he’s healing from a broken heart.

The second thing to keep in mind is showing him compassion, not affection. Be a true friend by listening to what he has to say. He might want to vent to you, so give him the shoulder he needs to cry on. You do not want to seduce him during this downtime because you do not want to be in a rebound relationship.

There is a huge difference between being a woman who has a crush on a man who is already taken and being a woman who comes in to snatch that man up. The first one is completely acceptable; the second one, you already know the answer.

If you’re not meeting the right men on your own, contact our expert matchmakers here at Dallas & Fort Worth Singles today by filling out our confidential questionnaire at the top of the page. Let us introduce you to quality men who are relationship-minded and eager to meet you!

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